humor

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 Names in this article have been altered to protect the guilty. The internet has ruined the family pet. When I was a kid, choosing an animal companion was simple. Selection took place in a variety of ways, none too complicated. Sometimes it was the adoption of a stray. Or […]

My standards of transportation are not high. My first vehicle was a Plymouth Fury, so large its sheer mass distorted the moon’s orbit. I’ve driven tractors, dirt bikes, and an antique Ford Bronco that got twelve miles to the gallon, when it actually ran. But there’s something I need to share about transportation that I’ve […]

With one leap I landed upon the counter, one foot on the conveyor belt and the other on the barcode scanner. I lunged at the checkout lady and my hands found their target. They gripped her fleshly throat and sank deep. Her eyes turned to glass and she gazed at the ceiling. “That’s right, girlie, […]

A couple decades ago a phone’s sole purpose in life was to allow one person to talk with another. The hardest part of operating the thing was to know the number you needed to call. Dial it wrong? Hang up and try again. No answer? Hang up and call back later. Hanging up on a […]

The family and I had been wanting to see the Statue of Liberty for a while, so we recently hopped on a train and spent the weekend in the Big Apple. It was an enlightening adventure, New York style, a city so diverse it makes Tangier Island look ordinary. We rode the Amtrak into Penn […]